Child of Venus
Love, loss and transformative sonic journeys with Kaelen Ohm aka AMAARA
AMAARA, the extraordinary talent behind mesmerizing and ethereal music, defies genre boundaries with her captivating blend of dream-pop, indie, and ambient influences. With a unique ability to craft haunting melodies, profound lyrics, and a commitment to authenticity, AMAARA takes us on a transcendent sonic journey that resonates deep within our souls.
In a conversation with Kaelen Ohm, the creative force behind AMAARA, I had the pleasure of experiencing a meeting of minds and a shared passion for life and music. It became evident that our views on the power of music aligned, recognizing it as not only a means of self-expression but also a transformative tool that allows us to connect with others. Music has the remarkable ability to bring together individuals who share similar perspectives, enabling us to empathize with their experiences and find solace in the collective human journey.
Kaelen's personal journey in music began amidst a backdrop of vinyl records and diverse musical genres that surrounded her upbringing. Influenced by legendary artists such as Janis Joplin, Neil Young, and Bruce Coburn, as well as contemporary alternative bands like Warpaint and Kurt Vile, her musical foundation was rich and eclectic. Drawing inspiration from the evocative songwriting of Thom Yorke and the ethereal soundscapes of Radiohead, Kaelen embarked on a path of musical creation, shaping her own unique artistic expression.
A few days before the release of her highly anticipated LP "Child of Venus," our conversation delved into the depths of Kaelen's artistic evolution. This introspective and reflective album stands as a testament to her growth as a musician, fearlessly exploring themes of love, loss, and self-discovery with unfiltered vulnerability. With meticulous craftsmanship, each track on "Child of Venus" weaves a sonic tapestry that effortlessly bridges the realms of timelessness and contemporary artistry, leaving an indelible mark on all who listen.
Photo Credit: Clifford Usher
Pilar: So, congratulations you on your new album. I loved it. I've been going through a particularly stressful period in my life, and when I listened to your album, it made me feel grounded. It was like having a heartfelt conversation with a friend about emotions and stress. Someone recently told me to take an hour for myself, to sit down with my feelings, and I did just that while listening to your album and it was incredibly cathartic.
AMAARA: Thank you so much. It's been quite a journey, and there were moments when it felt strange because it had been completed for a while before its release. Hearing that makes it all worth it. If even just one person feels that connection, then that's more than enough for me.
Pilar: Can you tell us a bit about the inspiration behind “Child of Venus” and how it represents you as an artist in your artistic journey?
AMAARA: So, “Child of Venus”, the title of the album, had been on my mind since early 2020. It sparked the idea of exploring my true essence, unaffected by external influences like my environment, public school, and parenting. I wanted to delve into the core of my soul, to understand who I was before the world left its mark on me. This introspective journey inspired songs that reflected my current experiences and encouraged contemplation and self-reflection. It was a period of deep introspection, where I questioned my true emotions, my perspective on the world, and my feelings about the circumstances I had been living in for the past few years.
From an artistic standpoint, this project opened up a pathway for me to trust my instincts and challenge myself. I started to critically examine what I was creating, ensuring that my vision and emotions were accurately translated through my music. In contrast to my previous album, "My Heart Speak," which was written, recorded, and produced in just nine days as a stream of consciousness project, "Child of Venus" took much longer. I started working on it in April 2021, after returning from Israel and finishing a series there. Initially, I thought it would be a month or two of work but what was meant to be a short recovery period evolved into a four-month journey, stretching until the end of August. This project allowed me to dive deeper into self-inquiry, creative exploration, and technical refinement, creating a unique and transformative experience for me as an artist.
Pilar: Do you think you are at the point in your life when it feels like it's the perfect timing for you to be releasing “Child of Venus”?
AMAARA: That’s a really good question. Trusting and surrendering to the flow of life has been crucial for me, both as an actor and as a musician. So much of our success and how people perceive our work is beyond our control. I've learned to have faith in the process itself. I pursue my passion because I genuinely love the journey, regardless of how it's received. But I'm also aware of the importance of giving my music the attention it deserves on the business side of things, in terms of promoting and sharing it with others.
Music has a universal and timeless quality that resonates with people across different eras. Whether it's my own compositions or songs by other artists, music has a way of touching our lives by exploring universal themes. It's incredible to think that songs from the '50s, '60s, early 1900s, or contemporary tracks can still evoke emotions and connect with listeners. That's what I find truly captivating about music. So, the timing is right because it's happening in the present. I have to trust that my music will find its place and resonate with those who listen to it.
Pilar: I read that in your writing process, you let the music flow. Can you elaborate a little bit on that approach and how that contributed to the process of creating your album throughout all these years?
AMAARA: Yeah, well, for me, songwriting has always happened in the studio. I'm not someone who has a bunch of songs saved up, writing in my bedroom or at home, and then brings 50 or 60 songs into the studio. Because my life is often occupied by film projects, there are moments when I realize, "Oh, I have a few months off, it's time to make an album." And during those periods, I may not have been actively playing instruments since I'm focused on shooting something that requires a lot of my energy. So, when I find myself in the studio with another person present, I'll just sit down at the piano or with a guitar in the morning and see what naturally comes out. Sometimes, there might be a melody that popped into my head while walking down the street or a snippet of lyrics. But only about 10% of the songs that end up on the records are ideas I had brewing beforehand. I've tried to figure out why music arrives to me in that way. I would love to be sitting at home writing song after song, but it just doesn't happen like that for me.
Making records, for me, becomes a time warp and a portal to a non-linear experience. I often reflect and wonder, "How did I even create that?" I knew I wanted some songs to revolve around specific experiences, but they seemed to manifest on their own, as if they had a life and direction of their own.
Pilar: As an actor and a musician, how do you manage to balance your creative pursuits? Since you channel energy into different voices and ideas, finding that equilibrium must be challenging. How do you navigate it?
AMAARA: I think the shift in focus and energy is something I actually really need. Just based on who I am in this lifetime. I've always really appreciated change and being able to kind of step into a different modality of expression or a different side of myself. I think that I've started to recognize that I'm a really dynamic person and just my interests and all these different little sub personalities I have in myself. So that's why I love acting so much because I can try on these different suits and go into different worlds and play different people who do different things. And then music is a way for me to process my human experience and process my grief and and turn it into something that feels really meaningful to me.
Finding balance between these two creative pursuits is a continuous journey. But they complement each other in remarkable ways. Acting allows me to immerse myself in different roles, explore new worlds, and embody characters who are entirely different from myself. Music serves as an outlet for me to process my emotions, delve into the depths of my human experience, and transform my grief into something meaningful and cathartic.
Pilar: What does it mean to you to immerse yourself in the experience of love and grief through music?
AMAARA: Oh, just hearing that question got me teary-eyed. Yeah, well, I just got super emotional. It's meant everything to me in the past two records, to be honest. It's probably saved my life in a couple of instances. Where some things that I've had gone through the last few years have probably been my first introduction to really experiencing love and grief and in a way initiating me into really being human and having this human experience and really feeling alive.
I really struggled with anxiety growing up, and I think because of how that works neurologically, I was not really able to be super present and feel a lot of things that were going on because I was in survival mode all the time. So in the past few years, just going deeper into myself and hearing a lot of that, my heart has been just ripped wide open and I'm suddenly feeling all these things. And music and film, it all became exponentially more meaningful to me. I suddenly understood, you know, at this somewhat later stage in life as an artist, why every song has been written and why every movie has been made. And so it's been just a deeply sort of sacred initiation and experience to be invited into that chapter of my life and to have music to explore that with.
It's such a unique modality of expression where you're taking a whole chapter of your life and distilling it down into two simple verses and a chorus. So it also allows me as a person to kind of contemplate what sometimes feels so monstrous as a person to bring it down to a simple idea and a simple melody. In a lot of ways that allows me to process my experience and allow it to come down to a more like a more simple theme or something, and then let it let it go out into the world when it's released and move on. So it's been super therapeutic that way.
Pilar: It sounds like therapy!
AMAARA: Oh, absolutely! I love therapy. I'm a huge advocate for it. I think everyone needs to be in therapy. It has played such an active role in my life, allowing me to delve deep into my experiences and find clarity both in my personal journey and in my art.
Pilar: I know that this record in particular has been very influenced by psychedelia. I am a huge fan, I love the experience that you get visually, musically, and emotionally, and how it allows you to connect with things in a different way. How has psychedelia helped you to connect with you inner child and allow you to heal past trauma?
AMMARA: I love your questions. First of all, I completely relate to what you said about the experience. Speaking of therapy, I know some folks who actually study psychedelics and trauma, and how one journey can really equate to years of therapy. And it's true. There's something about plant medicine that opens up the channel of connection, allowing us to see the wider web of our experiences and how things are interconnected, and how we got to where we are.
For me, psychedelics became a primary tool about four years ago in processing everything I was going through and healing the parts of myself that really needed attention. There's something particularly profound about psilocybin that distills an experience down to its true nature. The psychedelic experience allows forgiveness on such an expansive level to be so accessible, shedding all of our adult experiences and ego. Through psychedelics, I have been able to experience, at least in the moment, an incredible sense of oneness and deep forgiveness for all the people I've hurt and those who have hurt me. It helps me let go of the attachments my ego has to the narrative and the story, allowing myself to see through to the true nature of impermanence. It feels like being in an expansive state of being a child again.
This experience has also found its way into the record, particularly in songs like "Child of Venus" and "The Discovery of Innocence." Psychedelia has been a powerful force in helping me reconnect with my inner child and embark on a healing journey, allowing me to explore and express those aspects in my music.
Pilar: Do you believe psychedelia has the power to transport your listeners to another state of mind? Talking from my own experience when listening to your music, it felt like it allowed me to give space to my emotions and grow my state of consciousness, it made me feel connected.
AMAARA: I hope so! One thing that's challenging these days with music is finding the time for deep listening. There is an abundance of music that has the potential to transport us into psychedelic states and transformative experiences. But it requires our commitment to truly engage and experience the work. As an artist, I deeply understand the investment of myself, my time, my resources, and my soul that goes into creating music. The intention is to transport listeners to different states of being, fostering healing and contemplation. But it needs attentive and immersive listening. I genuinely hope that this record has the ability to achieve that. I hope there are more listeners like you who are willing to take the time to allow such an experience to unfold. In our clickbait culture, where we rarely listen to complete songs, let alone entire albums lasting 35 minutes or more, this kind of deep listening is a rarity.
Pilar: Out of all the tracks on your record, I kept coming back to “Bright Lights”. What was the message that you wanted to convey or the inspiration behind the song?
AMAARA: "Bright Lights" is actually inspired by a road trip I took from Los Angeles to Berkeley in 2020, right in the midst of the pandemic. I was visiting a friend in Berkeley, and at that time, I had just gone through a challenging social situation. It was one of those moments where everything seemed to unravel, and drama emerges. The song acts as a reflection of that period in my life, and perhaps it will resonate with others who have experienced similar circumstances. Lyrically, it's like a pretend conversation with myself and the person I was upset with.
Pilar: In what way do you believe your songs can serve as a musical companion for your listeners?
AMAARA: This album offers a dynamic range of songs that can resonate with different listeners in various ways. There are tracks that speak to those suffering heartache, giving them a sense of understanding. Some songs are more of a sonic experience. And then there are songs that encourage self-reflection and solitude. I love the experience of lying on the floor in the dark and immersing myself in the music, creating a sensory-deprived state where all I focus on is the music itself. But I also want people to feel free to dance to it or enjoy it while driving —however it resonates with them. That's the beauty of music—it has the power to affect each person differently, based on their own experiences and emotions.